Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Stupid Heart

"The heart was made to be broken"
—Oscar Wilde

You are one of my favourite writer but seriously this is some serious BS. No one likes a broken heart not you or me or any person. But we have or shares of broken hearts and the special one is the first one, the one where we thought (most of us) this is the end of the world. I too had mine share.

During my first in year in junior college I was very serious about the studies (towards the start by the time in ended I was back to normal) and I sat with a bunch of people who were very eager to study or so I thought so I joined them on the first few benches.

The first few days we actually did some study later on we just ogled the girl’s row beside us. There were a particular group of three girls who I ogled the most and I developed a soft corner towards two of them. Luckily a couple of them opted for German as me so it gave me an opportunity to talk to them. Both of them were nice girl one was much more talkative and friendly than the other so I was more drawn to the other girl.

Every aspect of her physical character drew me towards her suntanned skin, narrower facial shape, slender figure longer and darker lashes & higher cheek bones. I confided this to one of the guys he added fuel to the fire saying you to would look good together and other such pretty stuff which makes you more attracted towards her.

This news had spread around our group and they started teasing me whenever I was around her particularly one guy.  A couple of weeks later I missed a few days of college on account of my health and they day I returned I was told she started dating one of my friends. Remember the guy who teased me the most; it was him.

Was it awkward? Yes it was. Was it awkward for a long time? No it was not. Why? Because she ditched him. Was I happy? Secretly yeah. A year passed were all in 12th grade now. I again started developing a soft corner towards her and again I confided it to one of my friend, who later starting dating her for a couple of months.

This became a pattern even when we were in Degree College. I didn’t want to be another martyr and kicked my feeling out. One day I did say to her about my feelings I HAD for her she smiled and so did I.

“Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.” 
― Kahlil Gibran

I was then I realised the wise words of Khalil Gibran none of them had any depth in it. It always takes the right girl/boy for us to understand the depth. If you ask if I understand what depth is now? I would say “Yes I do.”