The Gold Necklace

Born in 1960 she was the third of the four children. Having both an elder sister and a brother made her insignificant in the family or she thought so or she felt so. She always thought having an elder sister is a significant problem like using her old dress, frocks etc. Getting controlled on the usage of talcum powder though these were not great issues at that age it felt like to her. A sense of suffocation or feeling of being forgotten to be pampered she felt it all even though she was ten. There was no way she could express her frustration or confide her feelings. The feeling of being neglected  feeling of being taken for granted & a strong feeling to get back at them. 

It was Vishu and was customary to give some money and new stuff for all the family members, especially the children, the father bought a gold necklace to the eldest girl as she was in her late teens and would soon be married. A full trouser was given to her elder brother. Seeing both the gift she was surprised as she had never seen such exuberant gifts given to anyone. She was the next in line, the next recipient of the gold necklace. She was impatient to flaunt her yet to receive a new necklace to her friends, cousins and the rest of the villagers. She could feel the envious eyes of her friends while the chain sway around her neck while they play, the extra glance she will take while getting ready to go out.  

Her father called her and she went forward expectantly, he kissed her on her forehead and she touched his feet as custom to show respect to him. She raised both of her small shaking arms to get her precious gift, her gold necklace. Her fathers hands were wrapped around it and he put the gift on her expecting hands. She never had thought the cold touch of the any metal could make her so happy. It was a 1 rupee coin. She was crestfallen, betrayed, angry & other emotions which she had never felt in her life till now. It felt she had waited all her life for the necklace. She turned away, taking her gift and an attempt to hide the tears from all the others. She was determined that she will wear the chain, the exact same chain.

A few weeks passed, yet the passion and the intense urge to wear the necklace had not decreased nor had she got an opportunity to take the necklace and try it. She couldn’t bear the urge any longer, she felt like a ticking time bomb which could explode any minute. The next day just while leaving for school, she saw the cupboard was open, she felt like fate has finally understood her and had finally given her what she wanted for weeks. With a slight hesitation, she took the necklace, wore it and gave herself  a momentary glance towards the mirror she left the house. She was happy an emotion which the girl had thought had deserted her for the last few weeks. She showed her friends the necklace boasting about it.  Arranging & rearranging it around her neck so that it will receive the maximum visibility.

It was not the fact she possessed the gold necklace that made her happy, it was the fact everyone thought that and saw it on her neck that made her happy. As she was not accustomed to wearing it, she forgot about her precious almost at the same time she arrived at her school. She studied, worked, ran without being cognizant of the necklace missing around her neck. The bell rang and she was the first to run from her class just to be the first to get out of school and wait for her friends. As soon the friends came, they went towards the farms the shortest path to their house.

Suddenly a shudder passed through her body, she moved her fingers around her neck to get the necklace missing. The little girl collapsed into tears, when her friends asked her why she was crying she told about the missing necklace. They retraced the path all the way back to their schools in search of the necklace, but no luck. The last of the teachers present at the school saw a few girls around the ground and one of them crying so came over to ask what had happened, and they recounted the whole of the story. Teacher assured that she will make an announcement during the assembly next day about it and will ask to give it back to her if anyone had found it.

Still crying the innocent girl and her friends were headed back home and telling the unfortunate event to everyone they see on their way and asked to keep an eye out for it. They even went to the nearby temple and church to pray and tell the priest about it so he could convey it to everyone coming there. Slowly the news of the missing necklace reached her house. The parents were already worried that their daughter had not reached home till now and now they got the news of necklace.

The mother decides to give her a good thrashing went in search of the girl. She had not walked for more than twenty paces and she saw her daughter. As she reached her, the mother threw a tight slap to the girl and pulled her towards the house. But as she pulled something slid of the girl’s shirt. The girl noticed it and called her mother to say that she found the missing necklace. The girl broke free of her mother’s clutches took the necklace and ran towards her house and hid herself behind her father.

By the time mother came to a second round of thrashing the father stopped her and asked her to get the necklace inside and to keep it properly. Then he lifted his daughter and asked her why she did it. She confessed everything to him expecting to get some more beating, but her father started laughing and said “Oh my baby, why do you suppose I bought your sister the necklace? She is not pretty like you she needs such accessories to make her pretty”.

This is all the girl wanted to hear, she was happy. There was not a little bit disappointment inside her for the necklace. She felt foolish to think she took it when she was so pretty in the first place.

PS: This is the little girl mentioned in the story above. This story is dedicated to this little girl, my mother.

With lots of love <3 <3

Flashes of Life

   

The afternoon was unusually cold and dry, he hadn’t seen such cold afternoon in more than five decades. He took out his pipe and put in a new batch of tobacco and started smoking. Smoking was one of the habits he had from his teens and he still continued it. He had herd people say it isn't good for health and always wondered “what's wrong with people now a days I am seventy seven and I have been smoking for last fifty god damn years and nothing has happened to me, people just make up such things when they have nothing else to do.”

He was feeling mild discomfort that afternoon and he blamed the cold and dry afternoon for that. He knew a few minutes with his white burley in pipe and all the discomfort is gone and he is good to go and start his work in farm.He loved the first few puff of the white burley it felt the problems also flew away along with the smoke and each smoke made his life simpler. But today it was different that uneasiness was still there, in fact it has increased now the uneasiness has crept down into the abdominal area and with a slight heartburn.

“The damn meat was too rare for me, my woman still don’t know what type of meat I like.” He was sure it was the meat and he have to suffer the heartburn till supper or worst the whole damn night. He had a sudden feeling of light-headedness “ Damn, white burley really is kicking today, may be I used a little too much.” Now the discomfort had completely gone, it was followed by slight pain, pressure, fullness and squeezing of the the chest. The pain was fast spreading to shoulders, arms, neck jaw and teeth. He was panting for breath now. He knew it is neither the cold and dry after noon, or the rare meat or the white burley.

His heart was beating fast, the pie in his hand had fallen down and he was called his wife for help. She came running dressed in an apron and some metal scrubber in her hands she was still cleaning after the lunch. When she saw he was about to fall on the ground holding his chest, she was just in time to support him. She took him inside and called the other people in the house for help.

He was eight, he could hear his parents debating over to send him to his aunts house as they didn’t have food and electric city as his father lost his job with half of the country because of great depression. He still felt that hopelessness which he felt as a kid to leave his family and still that agony was the same.

He was sixteen and was out with a girl for the first time, he was walking her back to her house they had reached her house. He was nervous he was unsure whether to kiss her or not he had never kissed anyone yet, unsure he leaned in to bid a farewell kiss. He kissed her cheeks first she didn’t move, he could smell the light aroma of the talcum powder she had used, slowly he moved towards her lips and so did she. He slowly place his lips over hers, she broke the kiss quickly and as she pulled away slowly they shyly exchanged good byes. She still didn’t meet his eyes.

He remembered the first time they had done it. It was beautiful for both of them and both of them knew they are going to get married someday. It felt wonderful somehow completing him, filling in a void. Making him the special someone to her.

Shortly after it they got married and he was enrolled in military and was send to fight for the country. That was the longest he was away from her. he came back home after four years of war and retiring from the army with ample savings to start a family.

He was twenty four when they were having their first kid. It was a baby boy, he had never seen such a beautiful and healthy boy before. He knew he will do anything and everything in his power to protect the child and to provide him with the best facility.

He was thirty nine and he lost his parents in a accident in his farm, he still blamed himself for that. The same year their first born was going for the first boy girl dance. He had his first father son moment then, he told him about kissing a girl for the first time.Many moments from his life unfurled in front of him, he had no regrets he lived it fully and with dignity. When life gave him lemons he made lemonades out of it.

The noise around him was slowly fading, the light was getting dimmer and then it all went silent.

The girl I met 5 times.

I was eleven, when I saw you first. Something in my chest was going bonkers that’s when I knew heart sometimes can act like crazy but I still didn't know why it was acting this way. Was it because of you? Or I was just dying. I didn't care which one was it as long as I was seeing you. I was just momentarily distracted by all this thought, but felt like I missed a lifetime without seeing you.

We were at the movie theatre  and I barely saw the movie all I want was to see you. I wanted us to talk but I didn't know what to say or how will you respond and above all I didn't wanted you to know I was staring at you. As the movie was ending I was feeling down. I didn't know when we are going to meet you again, that thought was killing me. After the movie we all went back and I was thinking about you for the remainder of the day. I soon forgot about you but occasionally I still thought of you.

It was almost a year later we met again. You have grown into a more beautiful girl, I still wonder how that was even possible? But it sure did, one of the many wonders of God I guess. You were more vibrant than ever. Your face was emitting some kind of glow making your face look angelic. I don’t know why but when you smiled I did along with you.

I had to wait for almost two years before I meet you again. This time it was different, you were no longer a small girl. You were slowly turning into a woman a beautiful woman. This time too we didn't talk. This time after going home I tried to find more about you, though I didn't much but I knew you love to read. I too started to read thinking this will bring us closer, it never did but id at least take my mind off you.

I waited for another two years before I met you again and then another one year for one more meeting. All of them were more or the same. I sat or walked around watching you while you were with your friends laughing and talking. I almost felt like a stalker though I never intentionally met you. Some of your habits were really amusing me. Like you tuck your hair on back of your ears as every time you make a sudden movement of your head it came down. Pull your ear when you are bored.

And after a gap of two and half year we met again and for the last time. I still remember how you looked, it was beauty personified. You were no longer a girl any more you were a woman. You wore a beautiful black dress, with your pixie haircut, a black handbag. This time we had a conversation. I accidentally (well by accidentally I mean purposefully) bumped into you and you dropped your bag. I said I am sorry and you retorted by saying it wasn’t mine fault and it was yours as you didn't look around while walking and you smiled and blew my mind and we walked apart.

It’s been 4 years that we last met. I still sometimes think and cherish these memories, it’s all that is left. Some times when I am at the mall I just take a look around to see if you are there and smile at myself for doing it.