In India you can never marry a girl or boy just because you love each other. First both the parents should accept. Then further their photos are passed through the whole of family (maternal and paternal uncles etc.) and any other people who are remotely related with them. Even the blurry visioned grandparents are asked to check the photograph. And all of them inquire about the family background, financial stability and other BS before giving their view.
Then comes the astrologer, they are the one who pass the final verdict, whether or not they can be married by looking at the horoscope if it’s a no from him then that is it, they are screwed. To reach till above stage there are many prerequisites you should be of same state, religion, caste, sub caste. If any of these are not a match then you have literally wage a war for the acceptance or elope.
There are many people I know who trying to fight all the odds so that they can be with the one whom they love. Sometimes the situation becomes so bad they have to choose parents or lover. This will definitely ends badly for everyone.
Most families are very fearful of the opinion of the society. How the society will look if their child is marrying someone they love.They feel people will blame them for this or say they were not very good at parenting.
From the time we can remember we are taught to love everyone. So what if we are loving particular person more than the others.Why does the parents feel loving someone is like betraying their trust and disrespecting them? Why do they put children in a tight spot of choosing between them and the lover? They don’t get if the children choose the parents they may end up resenting them for the rest of their lives.
Worst are the people who are loving someone but they know if the time comes to choose between parents and lover they going choose their parents. I don't say it’s wrong, but then you are making a person go through hell just for you and you slap him/her right on the face.
Once I did asked my parents “What if I love someone?”
Parents: “Don’t when you are of age we will find a nice girl for you.”
Me: “In your dreams people, in your dreams”
And I walked away.
Love is the most beautiful thing anyone can have in their lives, but some times it does hurt !
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